‘My dad was a ghost in my home.’ These are the haunting words of a young father I chatted to a few weeks ago. I met him as we watched our little kids at a restaurant’s play-section. He was on holiday and it was my day off. Julie was drinking a flat white nearby, and…
As Julie walked down the aisle, I was sure I’d never love another like that. I was wrong. Five years later, when I first glimpsed all 3 kgs of Eli, my heart fell in love all over again. In fact I’d fall in love a further 4 times – Fynn followed 2 years later, then…
Last week I got skunked. But all was not lost. I discovered ‘the two secrets of parenting’. Skunked refers to the surfer’s frustration of carving out a rare gap in your super-busy, responsibility-laden week in the hope of finding some glassy waves, only to find unsurfable drivel. I wasn’t skunked alone. A buddy (of 25 years) was at…
10 Ways To Slash Your Grocery Bill And Still Eat Healthy. Feeding our family takes a massive bite out of Julie’s and my monthly income. Next to our mortgage, it is our largest expense by some way. It also seems to us that food takes a larger bite every year – not just because our…
Parent, move your but. ‘I love you, but…’ How many times I’ve uttered this, mistakenly thinking it will anchor my child before providing some constructive criticism… Eli, I love you, but you need to listen the first time my boy! Fynn, I love you, but never take something without asking. Ivy, I love you, but…
I find it terrifying, but also dignifying, that I can shape who my child becomes – etching my influence and values into their deepest psyche. In my last two posts (click here and here), I’ve shown that this is especially done through the words I speak or for that matter fail to speak. My words…
‘The voice of parents is as the voice of gods.’ So says Shakespeare. I didn’t take him for much of a parenting expert, but on this aspect of raising kids, I have to agree with the old guy. Our words carry a kind of divine weight during our children’s early years… impressing something that will…
What you say to your kids becomes their inner voice. Perhaps, the most under-estimated dimension of my parenting is the words I speak, or don’t speak, to my children. Recently, back from his first day back at school, Fynn (5) proudly told Julie and I something that inspired this post… ‘Today, me and my fwiends…
Of course you love your kids. But how you express this love makes all the difference between them feeling loved or not. The same goes with listening. Of course we all listen to our kids. Of course we know how to listen – we think. But what if the way we listen has always been…
So many parents only capture their kid’s pictures, but forget to capture their words. Although listening is not my strong point, there’s one kind of listening that I’ve become good at – listening for the unforgettable things my kids say. About a decade ago, a seasoned parent told me, ‘Promise me this: when you have…
